10
Apr
2013
Don’t Stand So Close to Me
As a mother, I have been privileged to be a part of my children’s school life. I was coaxed into becoming a PTA Co-President all while being a room mother to my Kindergartner and handling various other responsibilities for the school. (Apparently, I have an issue with the “no” word). And with this privilege, I just figured my kids would be grateful to have me ‘around’ and involved in their school events. It never dawned on me that I would be an embarrassment. It was my oldest child’s Field Day and as a Yearbook Staff Member (let alone a mom) I was there to take pictures. While taking group pictures of my son and his friends, they all seemed to enjoy the special attention. Big smiles, laughter, and goofing off…that is what I wanted to capture for he and his classmates. I guess I was getting a little too close because my son turned to me saying “Can you please stop talking to me?” in a hushed voice that he thought no one else could hear. At first I was hurt since I always try my best to give him his distance around his friends. I have tried so hard to not be ‘that mom’ that smothers their children and never lets go. I want him to know that I trust him and his choices. I have tried to raise him in a way that allows him to be an independent and self-sufficient responsible citizen.
Proverbs 22:6 says “Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.”
Am I hindering him being independent? Does he not need me anymore? Have I already turned into ‘that mom’?! I guess I still have a lot to learn. But then I heard another boy’s comment, “At least your mom comes to these things…” and my child replies in a sigh, “I know…” So maybe I stand just a little bit further back and use my zoom just a little bit more. The precious moments of having a pre-teen have begun and another learning curve has started. I pray that the principles and ways that I have already taught him will carry on during this roller-coaster of an age. This is going to be fun.
One of the keys to raising kids who grow up to love and serve God is knowing the balance between protecting them and preparing them. The simple idea behind this diagram is using your child’s eighteen years under your roof as an opportunity to gradually introduce him or her to the world they must eventually flourish in. It’s a balancing act between protection and preparation as well as between parental control and a child’s individual freedom. To discover more information on how to implement this chart in your own families see Why Christian Kids Rebel.